


Now and Then

by adia90



Series: Something For The Pain [2]
Category: Real Person Fiction
Genre: F/M, Sad with a Happy Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-03
Updated: 2018-12-03
Packaged: 2019-09-06 07:19:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,855
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16827823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/adia90/pseuds/adia90
Summary: Tessa was just trying to eat dinner.





	Now and Then

_Dear heart of mine,_

_I don’t apologise for not waking you up because you are not exactly nice in the morning. I do apologise however for not getting a proper poached egg done for you because you tired me out last night and I woke up 10 minutes before my taxi was supposed to pick me up. Will see you back in three days, my love. Til then, keep my side of the bed warm, won’t you._

_Love you (but you know that),_  
_S_

Tessa smiles at the parchment left on the pillow next to hers. Maybe it is her imagination but it smells of his usual scent, on top of his Dior Homme. She stretches a bit and places the letter and the white rose on the bedside table.

She goes through the motion of the day, brushing her teeth, while pouting at the sight of the extra toothbrush in the cup. She is going to suck pretending not to miss him. After her shower, which she hurries through lest she starts feeling herself up to the memories of last night’s shower, she puts on a pair of jeans and a matching sweater before going out to run some errands for the day.

Downtown London is where her boutique cum office is located. Sometimes she has to travel to Toronto and Montreal for shows, but most of the time she sends her staff to handle the schmoozing nowadays. She prefers to be behind the scene now, creating from her home office, collaborating with her favorite designers especially her old friend Mathieu Caron.

“Honey, I’m home!” she greets her staff, pushing through the entrance with a big smile on her face. She gets a myriad of ‘morning!’, ‘hi!’, ‘sup, boss?’ in return.

“Miss T, Cam from Vogue Canada called to confirm the date,” Lauren calls from her place at the reception.

“It’s on. Who wants to go with?” she answers, getting a slew of ‘me!’ from all of her staff.

She laughs. “Gavin, as usual, do your thing,” she instructs her PA, who starts drawing straws for the eager staff. She tries to bring different staff at every assignment to provide them the exposure they need, as after all, everybody has to start somewhere. She is fortunate that her platform has been paved for her, and she feels like it is her personal responsibility to nurture them to success.

The day goes on filled with laughter (as per usual). She tries to promote healthy work environment in her office; she of all people knows the best about workplace (ice rink, if you prefer) stress. They order in lunch, and proceeds to talk smack about the latest on the runway. She’s glad that everyone has a genuine smile on his and her face before leaving the office everyday.

The fun she has in the office sometimes makes her forget the ding (or lack thereof) on her mobile. But when it comes, she smiles so wide that Lauren catcalls.

_Missing you. So much. S_

“Bring him around more, boss. I’d say hashtag _puthimontherunway_ challenge,” she says, to the horror of her boss. “Amen to that!” comes from the store area.

Tessa shakes her head. “Nope, nope. That azz is mine,” she declares, vetoing the idea.

“Party pooper,” Gavin, who nurses a crush, stage whispers.

Tessa rolls her eyes. “Hands off my man,” she warns playfully. She knows it was a big mistake to bring him to her office last month.

They depart that evening in high spirits, with everybody looking forward to the Vogue photoshoot. It has been a great year, and she is grateful for the support that surrounds her. Last year she had struggled, had found perspective, and in the end unearthed the happiness and contentment that she has been searching all along.

She couldn’t ask for more. And a new special project involving ivory silk and tulle for next spring is keeping her on her toes.

She returns home, which looks but doesn’t feel the same, due to the lack of his presence tonight. She has thrown caution to the wind and he has moved in half a year ago. She can’t remember not having him around, as he colors every aspect of her life, and space, from the hockey sticks haphazardly thrown in the hall closet, his novels within the mix of hers (he reads historical autobiographies and military fictions a lot), his t-shirts (and boxers) folded and misplaced in her drawer, his crockpot (yes, he owns one) in her kitchen cabinet and of course, his toiletries littered around her bathroom sink.

Their lives together is an organised chaos and she looks forward to every single day of it.

She prepares a sandwich for dinner (she is yet able to master cooking, despite his daily tutorial session) when the doorbell rings. She pouts, but makes her way to the door. She peeks at the peephole, and pulls back, surprised. It has been a few months since she last saw him. Nevertheless, she opens the door, greeting her visitor with a polite smile.

“Scott?”

Her ex-skating partner flashes a sheepish smile, rubbing the back of his neck. His hair has gotten longer, back to the Latch era and he looks good, despite the noticeable eyebags. “Hey, T. May I come in?”

She hesitates for a second, but he used to be her partner for twenty two years, despite the whatever that happened last year, she still considers him as one of her lifelong friends. “Of course,” she says, opening the door wider.

“I just made myself a sandwich. You want some?”

He sits himself down slowly. He looks around, noticing a hockey jersey haphazardly thrown on the back of the sofa. He visibly tenses, as she observes silently. Realising she is still waiting for an answer, he shakes his head, smiling softly.

“I’m sorry to interrupt dinner.”

“It’s okay, Scott. Do you want coffee, at least?” she asks again, trying to be a good host.

“No, T. I’m good. You don’t have to trouble yourself.”

She smiles. She sits down on the armchair opposite to him. “What brings you to my neck of woods?”

“Can we talk?”

“Of course. Is everybody at home okay? How’s Jackie?”

His jaw clenches. She looks on, worried. “Are you okay?” she asks, reaching out to place a hand on his.

“T, give me time, please?” he whispers, looking down at their hands together.

“Take your time, Scott. Whenever you feel comfortable, then tell me,” she replies gently.

He shakes his head, sniffling. “No, no. Give me _time_ , so that I can resolve things on my end. I miss you. So much.”

Realisation dawns on her and she makes to pull back her hand. “What do you mean?” she asks, needing clarity, her heart beating fast.

He drops down to her feet. She gasps. “I need you. I keep on going back to last year, and I just can’t forget. I’m sorry, baby,” he begs.

“Scott, you’re with Jackie,” she says, blood pounding in her ears. “What are you doing?”

“I want to be with you, T. You’re the love of my life. I didn’t mean for it to go on for so long. I’ll end it, Tessa. I want to be with you. Just, give me time,” he begs again, reaching for her hands.

She shakes her head, shocked. Almost sad too. “Scott, a year ago, I had begged for the same, but you chose not to wait for me,” she reminisces. “I had waited for you for twenty one years, but I just asked for a year, for me, to spread my wings, but you couldn’t provide me the support that I needed.”

“I do support you, Tess! I’m your biggest fan!” he pleads, his bloodshot eyes trying to make contact with hers.

She smiles ruefully. “Not anymore, you’re not. You left me again last year, remember?”

“I’ll do better, I promise. I always come back to you. Don’t you remember?”

“You don’t have to, this time,” she whispers.

“Don’t say that, baby. Please…”

She squeezes his hands, trying to comfort him. Because she has been doing it all her life, it is all she remembers. “Remember last year when I was admitted to the hospital? Food poisoning?”

He blinks, nodding slowly. He was down in Florida at the time. He had heard from Charlie, who had gone to visit.

“I had OD-ed on Xanax. It was the worst I had felt. Ever. Jordan found me. Sam was the physician on call. He had to pump my stomach.”

Scott falls back, stunned.

“He was the one who put me back together, Scott.” She smiles, thinking about the man, far away in Baltimore, attending a medical conference. “He didn’t know who I was, being recently migrated from the States, and he didn’t even know that there’s an event for ice dancing in the Olympics,” she continues, laughing at the memory.

“I’m telling you not to make you feel bad, Scott. I just want to explain my rationale. I will always remember you as my greatest love, but maybe we’re not meant to be in this lifetime? 21 years should have been enough time to bring us together, don’t you think?”

“T, baby, please. I’d die, Tess. It’s worst than Sochi, knowing I did that to you, during the pinnacle of our career. I didn’t mean to, baby. I wasn’t thinking straight. I wanted to show you I could live without you. But I can’t, kiddo. Please, I’m begging you.”

“I love him, Scott. He made me see the love beyond the confines of you.”

Punch to the gut would hurt less, Scott thinks. “You don’t love him. I was yours for twenty one years, T. You love ME. You know you do.”

She shakes her head, looking intently into his troubled hazel eyes. “You were mine when you felt like it, Scott. The moment I asked for something, you flew away. I’m setting you free now. Be happy, Scott.”

“Please, kiddo. Don’t do this.”

She tugs to free her hands, and Scott feels for the first time the mass on her ring finger. He looks down, an emerald nestled within a halo of white diamonds, reminiscent of her gorgeous green eyes. His heart drops even lower. “When …”

“Last week.”

“Tess…,” he opens his mouth, grappling for words. “I have a ring, baby. I bought it in Antwerp. Remember you told me it’s the diamond capital of the world? T, I want -.”

She cuts him off with a smile. “I know, Scott. Twenty one years, remember? You couldn’t hide anything from me. But you didn’t want to wait to give it to me.”

“Kiddo. Please…”

She pulls him up from the floor. And wraps her arms around him, her cheek on his shoulder, while his lips seek her neck, maybe for the last time. “I’m sorry, Scott.”

“I love you, kiddo. This and every other lifetime,” he whispers, his heart flailing and drowning. She can feel his tears on her skin.

She has no more tears for him. Her heart soars, finally free. “No matter what,” she whispers back.

**Author's Note:**

> As apparent, I am Team T. Sorry not sorry. I hope our Queen will end up with a guy who loves her enough to fight for her. Let's be sad together, babies :)


End file.
